Day: July 29, 2019

I got to see Sean and meet his wife. Apparently it had been twelve years since we’ve seen each other. It all seem so familiar and unfamiliar at the same time. It was pleasant, refreshing and I’m really happy I had the opportunity to see them.

I still needed rest.

But there was work conflict… and colleagues running their mouth… so I was far from it. It was so frustrating that it made me cry. I’m embarrassed that friends had to see me like that. But it’s fine. I needed to stand up for myself. I’m so sick of being pushed over and surrounding myself with “fuck that bitch” attitude. If you have a problem, say it to my fucking face. Fuck, man. Forget it.

I aspire to be in a work environment where I can continue to learn and grow as a person and this environment is not it. I’m happy to be leaving the convention world for a while. I’m happy to finally step away and spend more time and energy on myself.

I missed my flight and I had to book a new one… I’ve been spending my day and night killing time in airports…

but it’s all over now. I know I can rest soon.

I’m doing my best in this situation. I really am.

I left Toronto just a few days ago. I packed for life abroad as well as I could and now my new life weighs about 50lbs. My mom and dad sent me off at the airport. It was sweet. My mom even took a selfie with me and I initiated a hug goodbye to my dad. I’ve never hugged my dad before in my entire adult life. I think this move will really help me connect with my parents. I’m going to be very mindful of keeping in touch.

This weekend was extremely hard on me. I flew into DC without much sleep. My back and my ankle had been hurting. The bolt’s are coming loose in my ankle and I think I’ve been carrying too much weight on my back. I just really want to rest… I couldn’t check in until 6pm so I killed time at the Museum of American History. I was much too tired to absorb any of the information I was reading but I tried my best to absorb the pleasantries of historical objects and an unfamiliar environment. I couldn’t stay long. I had run out emotional strength.

But I still couldn’t check in. I found myself at the bar at Farmers & Distillers to settle my hungry stomach and a have drink to put me at ease. A crossword over a martini picked me right up. Kevin, on the other side of the bar, treated me kindly. He made a makeshift steamed wetnap and treated me to a donut. He was pleasant company while I waited for time to pass.